We've Got Balls is a quirky, family-friendly that offers a good many laughs as it imparts a tender and important social message. The film's premise centers around the concept that what may mean nothing to one person may mean everything to somebody else. It keys in on the proverbial David and Goliath scenario when a filthy-rich land developer, Vivian Brechner, decides not to renew the land lease on a bowling alley in a small town, so that together with a local avaricious tribal Indian chief, she can tear it down to make way for a gambling casino.
But what happens when the 52 people in Fountain Springs learn that Fountain Bowl — the “only thing they've got” — is teetering on the brink of destruction? Their community lifestyle, as they have known it, is about to come to an abrupt and tragic end.
When the townsfolk get word of it in the Fountain Spray newspaper, suddenly all hell breaks loose!! Herman Pritzloff, who inherited the bowling alley from his late father (and runs the establishment with his inept twin sons, Irwin and Simon) is faced with having to raise nearly $500,000 to exercise his first right of refusal to buy the land on which the bowling alley sits once the 25-year lease expires. While he intends to save it, he can only secure a loan for half of the needed funds.
When Brechner's son, Alexander, is sent to face Fountain Springs’ Mayor Dawson Dinwitty, and city councilman George Pandick (who also serves as the alley’s bowling instructor), we learn that both the mayor and the city council will have to vote in favor of the demo for it to go forward. So, what happens when greed gets the better of the mayor? We see Dinwitty play both ends against the middle, outwardly supporting the town, while allowing Vivian Brechner to wine, dine and golf him to win his vote.
The situation takes a critical turn when Irwin and Simon Pritzloff soon befriend Vivian’s son, Alexander Brechner, who is sent to act as her intermediary with the “city government.” The twins get drunk with Alexander in the bowling alley's lounge, and before the night is out, the bet is on: They entice Alexander into a deal in which they agree to bowl against him and his well-to-do Newport Beach buddies in Fountain Bowl's annual “Over the Shoulder, Under the Arm,” tournament for a sum of $250,000. If Brechner loses he has to pony up the money which will allow the Pritzloffs to buy the land on which Fountain Bowl sits. If the twins lose...well they have nothing to lose.
It's a two-out-of-three day contest. Anyone can win. The townspeople are all in: Craig Cramer, the lounge's Karaoke singer (and alley maintenance man); standup comic, Chris Haig; attorney, Saul Sandowitz; notary public, Charlie Pratt; bartender, Fred Kincaid; Tinker Belle (the youngest of all who Pandick says is too small to bowl in the tourney); and also “Big Bowling Paul,” whose girth nearly spreads across an entire bowling lane.
Fate begins to move in a new direction when Tyrone, one of the demolition workers slated to destroy the bowling alley, shows up to check out the building. Inside, he catches Karaoke wanna-be Craig Cramer in the act of taking on his first rap song. A friendship is forged which changes the game on night three of the tourney when Tyrone and his pals step in on the town’s side.
And then of course there is a twist with Craig Cramer's dog, Leonard: Was he the last to see the contract between Alexander the twins?
And let's not forget Grandma Jean, Tink's caregiver, who home-schools Tink and a few other local children: Her secret 'garden' changes the game entirely.
And to complicate matters even further there is the beautiful young gal at the front desk, Melanie. Alexander is smitten with her, but then...so is George Pandick and the Pritzloff twins.
How could the fate of something as simple and innocent as a bowling alley get so complicated? Well, it just does. The story gets messy, tense, suspenseful and, at the same time, funny. And, the finale? It won't surprise you, it will shock you! In the end, we learn who will win, who will lose, and who's got balls!!